Moving a Grave safely
1. Have Night Life expansion.
2. Have the following hack: No Unlinkage on Urnstone Delete
3.Have the following hack: The Urnstone Spawner
4. "Have Cemetery as Lot #1" (I have no idea how to find out what Lot 1 is).
So The Urnstone Spawner will let you create the Urns/Tombstones for any existing dead sims on your lot. That is, if you already have dead sims to put in your cemetery, but not sitting on an existing lot.
Once your elder sims die, the MATY hack will let you send the tombstone to the cemetery without losing the character detail.
From the MATY thread:
(Ancient Sim) "All you do is get the Sim to click on the gravestone and send it wherever they want to (there is an option to send it to Gothier Green Lawns if you have the default Downtown). The ghosts will then stand and wave goodbye and their gravestones will disappear in a puff of smoke. You then need to go to the cemetery in build mode, where the gravestones will be waiting by the mailbox for you to place wherever you want them. Should you want to return them to a lot later, the Sim who lives on the lot needs to go to the cemetery and click on them again, then choose "Send home". There is never actually any need for them to go into the inventory unless a Sim is moving house, as far as I can see."
Is this the only way? I don't want a load of graves on my lot so I did want a sort of community graveyard - I guess I could make an old peoples home with an attached graveyard, but poor poor simmies . Imagine, sat in an old sims home with a nice handy graveyard outside your bedroom window.
If nobody is left alive on the lot, then wait for the time when you have another family move in, click the headstone, and select the option to move it to another lot. Select the cemetery, done. Once you visit the cemetery, you may still have to move the headstone around, because it will by default be near the community phone.
I have NO hacks for this, and I have NEVER had issues with this procedure! Why people need to make things so complicated, I don't know. Because it is as simple as I described it here.
1. Click on the grave
2. Select "Move This Grave" (If you have several graves on a lot, you will also get the option to move all graves at once)
3. On the menu that pops up, pick the community lot you want the grave(s) to move to.
When you next go to that lot, the grave will be by the phone. After I've had a number of deaths, I like to go in via the neighborhood screen (I think it's the Lots & Houses button, and then Build) and arrange the tombstones the way I want them, then save.
The one drawback to this method is that all ghosts then become "old age" ghosts, even if the Sim originally died some other way. I personally don't care about ghost color, but if you do, BO's method is the simplest way to preserve it. Note that if you move a tombstone before it spawns a ghost for the first time (which can take up to 3 days), then it never will spawn a ghost.
I do have nounlinkondelete, just on general principles.
To recap my understanding so far:
Get the nounlinkdelete hack. If my sim dies of old age, just move them the way esme says. IF my sim dies of anything else (unlikely in Leetown, but still...) move them the way BO says and in all cases make sure the ghost has spawned IF I want the ghost on the graveyard lot. Right?